Floraish

Well I had a pretty crazy weekend!

On Friday was John’s graduation, so I hit that and took many photos that turned out not too bad considering we were like a million miles away from the stage. It was good, I managed to pick up Mrs Cook from the airport on time, which was a plus. Too bad it took 50 minutes to make it back into the City. Absolutely ridiculous. I had to rush off right after the ceremony as it went a bit longer than expected and I had to prepare for a busy night at work. Work wasn’t much better and finishing late, meant even LESS time to chill out afterwards because I had to go to bed almost right after to get up in time for a 4AM wake-up call. My dad’s in Mackay at the moment, but I volunteered to drive him to the airport and win some brownie points in the process.

So onto Saturday. Since I was already up and out and about, I went shopping at Garden City and ended up buying a couple of things.. okay fine, I bought five (5) things. All for full price too. Ugh what’s wrong with me?!?!?! But they were mega fine, and mega cute. I wore two of the pieces to my audition on Sunday (elaborated a bit later). Later that day, I was texting John and it turns out he’s on my side of town for the night at his uncle’s place in Regents Park. So I got extended an invite for drinks and pool, which I gladly accepted. So right after work, I went right over and was welcomed with open arms, which was really good. I’m not used to the whole extended family business, so it was a very welcome change. Two Woodstocks and three games of pool later, it was too cold to be outside. Turns out the Carters own a whole menagerie of different animals so I got to go around looking at each of them. I even handled a snake!! A real live snake! There’s pics somewhere, so we shall see! Bet it’s just picture after picture of sheer terror on my face lol.

Sunday included a real live hockey game at UQ, and lots of napping and chatting, and eating. It was grrrrrreat. It was a nice bummy sort of day with snippets of Olympics here and there and good conversation. Pretty much crashed out when I got home, but it was all worth it.

Long live the weekend!

I’m a bit at a loss for words at what to write.

So, let me tell you about my weekend. Today I’m going to be going to the airport to pick up John’s mum and then we’re going to QPAC for John’s post-graduate studies graduation ceremony. Yay! I’ll get to dress up and stuff. Though, I should probably get a move on since it’s like 9:45 at the moment and I take forever and I have to leave my house at 11:15. Anyways, so that will be fun. Also gotta clean out the car. Boo.

Tomorrow. I’ve no idea yet. So watch this space.

Sunday! It’s kinda jam packed, but I have the whole day and night off, so I’m going to watch John’s hockey game, hard to believe I never made it to any previous ones. And hopefully if times and stuff work out, we can go steam boat for dinner with Tate and co. I’m really enjoying all this time I’m getting to spend doing fun things and not flipping out on my own problems, because they’ve pretty much dissipated and my heart is so much clear with where it wants me to go.

Giving into your emotions is surprisingly easy, like I was saying yesterday. If you do the old cliche ‘follow your heart’ model, then life can be breezy, provided of course that your head and heart don’t form a conflict of interest. Which luckily, mine aren’t. Things are great.

I haven’t gotten around to reading much, which is a shame because I really want to finish the book before spoilers kick in. My brother has already read the wiki and knows what’s going on and it’s taken ALOT of effort to get him to stfu. I kinda don’t like the fact that it’s written in three separate books in both Bella and Jacob’s view. I mean, sure it’s a great confrontation and all, but sometimes when I think about it, it’s all very much over the top, drama theatrics. That or I’ve never been seriously hurt before (which I have, so I tend to think it’s the former). From New Moon, you hardly see any sparks apart from the odd moment of crushing. Bella and Jacob have not so much even been more than friends, but somehow he’s developed some full massive ‘omg can’t live without you!’ point of life. Fair enough.

I’ve had a pretty good week so far.

Things have been going really well. I’ve decided not to follow anything too closely and just let my feelings take over. Giving into them isn’t hard. Resisting is, but who can say no? I’m on my path of working things out and the future looks pretty clear to me.

Yesterday, John, Lex and I headed down the Gold Coast for some Timezone action! It was really good, a nice way to spend a public holiday. Bar the last 30 minutes when I went overtime in the carpark and was flipping out trying to get back before the inspector got me! But he didn’t so it’s all good. Then we had to rush off to work, to which John said that he’d hang out there with us so we could all leave and watch a movie afterwards. Great idea because mum ended up feeding him and let us all leave early. So we got home, crashed on the couch and watched the first two Batman movies (Batman and Batman Returns - Keaton sucks). So in between fighting over why Batman had dark curly hair, and making copious amounts of tea (well, I put the kettle on twice), we had a really great day overall.

I’ve no idea if I want to go to uni today. Well I should. Anyways, it’s been decided for me. No uni, if I can help it

Monday nights = $10.95* steak night at the Calamvale Hotel

Deciding to fully take advantage of that offer, John and I (mostly I) headed off to the ‘Vale and got stuck into some awesome rump, garlic bread and good old alcohol. A must for everyone. We ended up playing 3 games of pool, with me almost winning 2 of them. Actually, I did win them. Screw you John!

Then we got the hint the pub was closing, so we went back to my place and watched The Addams Family movie. Hahahahahaha so much innuendo I never understood when I watched that movie the first time around (in ‘96? I can’t recall).

I’m rather tired. I had a long and boring, emo day. Same again tomorrow then? Sure!

*indicates that a drink must be purchased. John got a beer, I got some midori

When you love the one who is killing you,
it leaves you no options.
How can you run, how can you fight,
when doing so would hurt that beloved one?
If your life was all you had to give, how could you not give it?
If it was someone you truly loved?

Feeling massively shit. Torn. Listening to Enya. Looking for some guidance. Life? Love? Career? All meaningless? I really don’t want to be here. I don’t want to deal. I don’t like consequences. I don’t like choices. I don’t know anything.

I just want a release.

I don’t care if you think I’m being too hard on myself, or don’t give myself enough credit. I am, without a doubt, a dickhead. I’ve never had much of a conscience before, and now that I seem to have discovered one, I feel absolutely sick in my stomach. I don’t think I could possibly eat anything tonight. An over ambitious person like me doesn’t deserve anything.

“And yet, to say the truth,
reason and love keep little
company together nowadays.”

William Shakespeare

A Midsummer Night’s Dream
Act III, Scene i

I’ve decided to leave.

NT is warmer, and I’m sure the people there are nice. I’ll be independent and not be living in a little bubble. I can’t wait.

Don’t miss me too much.. :p

PS: Breaking Dawn is out but I haven’t had a chance to go out and get it yet! Grrrr.. Better not see any spoilers in the days to come. I really love this series. It’s everything a great novel should be! I might speed read through the third one again, just so I can prepare for the final. I don’t know which one is my favourite yet though. I didn’t really like the second one too much. The idea of a werewolf vying for Bella’s affections were… ugh. Werewolf vs vampire is always good. Though such a typical formula.. Can’t they have different enemies already?! It would be a TREMENDOUS cop out if Bella becomes some kind of hybrid (ala Underworld). I hope Stephanie Meyer has more creativity than that!

Well, funny story..

I ended up waking up after a pretty decent sleep (9+ hours, yeah baby!) and jumped online to check out the new August edition of the QPUE Journal. Interesting read this month.. particularly regarding Dennis Ferguson and one police officer who made some pretty lame comments to reporters during the situation. Turns out she told reporters “How do I explain to my two year old, that I as a Police officer have to protect a pedophile?”. Fair enough comment, but get real. Turns out the letter continued to point out how this particular officer wasn’t even on the protection detail and just turned up to give all the other officers attitude. Funnily enough, she wasn’t even a front line police officer.

So after having a slight chuckle to myself and setting a reminder to check the ‘Letters to the Editor’ column next month for a response, I moved on and continued reading. The final page was an advert for NTPOL and they’re accepting applications now for their March 2009 intake! They’re going to be running an assessment centre in Brisbane late September. I’m pretty ‘GAH!’ right now, because I don’t graduate until June. So I’m going to call and find out when the intake after that is. If it’s like August/September intake then I might go.

I know I said I wouldn’t leave, but it’s an excellent career opportunity..

Well things are certainly different!

For one, it’s FUCKING COLD! Just thought I’d point it out. I hate it. Whatever they’ve told you about Queensland, is false. We’re just as bad as a dreary Melbourne morning. All four seasons in one day. Bleh!!!~

It’s now week 2 of semester 2, 2008. It’s going well. LTCS1005 and CHIN2200 are total bludge classes so I’m enjoying them. My two compulsory subjects of SOCY3049 and CRIM3070 are a *tad* harder. For SOCY3049, there are only two pieces of assessment, however they are both worth 50% each.. and for CRIM3070, there is a semester long research project I need to complete, however it’s been broken down into 3 sections, with an additional 2 pass/fail marks. Sigh. The good thing though, I will have no finals at the end of semester, just the LTCS1005 final, but I’m already certain I’ll get at least a 6+ without showing up for class. It’s so easy. I practically have laughed my way through it.

Last semester results were:
CHIN1200 - 6 Distinction
CRIM2011 - 5 Credit
SOCY2329 - 5 Credit
POLS1101 - 4 Pass

Which leaves a GPA of 5.00! Yay for not even trying! Imagine if I did.. :] Anyways, a 5.00GPA allowed me to do a 5 subject workload this semester, however there were about a million timetable clashes which didn’t work out. So I was pretty angst about that. But no matter, 2 more subjects in Summer semester, the usual 4 in semester one, 2009 and I will be done!